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Category: The Milk Can (Page 15 of 17)

Tapping the Main

I have two favorite TV shows: This Old House and Ask This Old House. Maybe it is because I live in an old house. Saturday nights from 5:30 – 6:30 pm are sacred. This is when the new episodes come out. If I happen to miss them for some reason, they are released on-line at 6:00 pm, central, each Sunday night.

Water MainIn one of the recent episodes the house they were working on had a water pressure problem. Its water inlet had become plugged and even though they were connected to the water main it just wasn’t getting to the house. The solution was obvious; they dug a trench and ran a new water line to the house.

Of course, there were other options they could have done. The family could have shouted, “Hey, Culligan man?” and had bottles of water delivered to their home every day. They could have set a large barrel on their roof to collect rain water for the family’s needs. Each night, they could have snuck over to their neighbor’s house and filled jugs of water off of their outside faucet. They even could have scheduled a daily pilgrimage to Wal-Mart to buy cases of bottled water to quench their thirst.

All of these methods could have worked, and sometimes we have to do them. But the ordinary means for getting water is to connect a line to the water main. Right?

Sometimes a person may ask me why they have to be baptized, take communion, read their bible, pray, attend church, or serve others. Is this really the only way we can experience God’s grace? Are these really the only ways God speaks? They may say, “I don’t like structure and rules, I want to experience God in my own way. You are making it sound these things are requirements to be saved.” It is true they are not necessary for salvation, but yet, they are. It is one of the many paradoxes of faith.

God works in many different ways. There are many different ways we might experience and receive God’s grace. Just like there are many different ways we can get water into our homes. However, God has also set-up ordinary means by which we receive his grace. It is not that we don’t sometimes receive his grace in other ways, but the spiritual practices are the ordinary way we receive his grace. If the ordinary way of getting water into your home is to tap into the water main and the ordinary way of receiving God’s grace is through the spiritual practices, does it not make sense to tap in?

Pastor Stephen

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Sacrificial Leadership

Dear Friends,

If there is one book on leadership I could buy for everyone who has the audacity to call themselves a Christian leader is it David McKenna’s Christ-Centered Leadership: The Incarnational Difference.

I first heard of this book, oddly enough, from a tweet by our denominations lead pastor Jo Anne Lyon. I have learned whenever she recommends a book I go out and buy it immediately and read it. Not because she is the boss, but because of her wisdom.

McKenna paints a very different picture of leadership than many of the books we read from the business world. It is not that those books are wrong it is just that they stop short. Short of something that can only be true of one who is a Christian: The incarnation. “Servant leadership is the highest commendable option for the human mind, but sacrificial leadership is reserved for those who have the mind of Christ. The two are worlds apart. (pg. xii)

“Jesus defines Christian leadership:

Power–it has none
You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord is over them and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you.

Prestige–it is least
Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant,

Position–it is last
And whoever wants to be first must be your slave,

Purpose–it is self-giving
Just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve,

Proof–it is sacrificial
And to give His life as a ransom for many. (Matthew 20:25-27)” (pgs. 4-5)

I have much to learn as a leader. It is a daily struggle to keep my own pride and selfishness from rearing its ugly head. When the inconveniences of leadership interfere with my plans the temptation is always there to choose myself. McKenna said on his eighty-fourth birthday he thought he was finally ready to lead. I doubt I will live long enough to say those words.

What are your thoughts? Is Christian leadership only reserved for those who have the title of “Pastor” or can it exist in today’s secular corporate world? Please post a comment.

Blessings,
Pastor Stephen

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The Misdirected Leader

I like listening to podcasts. Though I have learned my attention span is about twenty minutes. After that, I am ready to move onto another.

A few of my favorites are: Entreleadership (Dave Ramsey), Cartalk, College Wesleyan Church (Steve DeNeff), Redeemer Presbyterian Church (Timothy Keller) and Rainer on Leadership. It is the last one that got me thinking recently. I was listening to a podcast on Eight Struggles Pastor Face. Thom Rainer shared about two kinds of pastors: Lazy pastors and workaholic pastors. Every pastor/leader at one time or another has felt the pull to either extreme and both can be destructive to a church and to the pastor.

As I reflected, I started to think there is another kind of pastor, the “misdirected” pastor. It is a deadly place to be at. Many misdirected leaders find themselves being accused of being lazy and yet feeling like they are about to burn out from workaholism. The reason is a lack of direction and vision.

Who is the misdirected leader? It is the pastor who is doing a lot, but doing a lot of the wrong things. These are the leaders who spend all of their time and energy maintaining the machine that is church. When you look at this persons week you see they are teaching the adult Sunday School class, preaching every Sunday morning and night, leading a Tuesday Bible study, Wednesday night study, cleaning the bathrooms, painting the classrooms, leading the singing, organizing the Thursday prayer meeting, planning every detail of the worship service, driving the bus pick up kids and the hearse to bury the dead, and organizing the Saturday morning men’s breakfast. And when you get done with those things pastor could you start an 8-track ministry?

Why is the pastor doing all these things? Because someone decided they need to be done and after all, “pastor, this is what we are paying you for.” John Wesley said to his ministers, “You have nothing to do but save souls.” Truth be told, almost none of it has anything to do with saving souls. We will give it fancy names so we can pretend it is about souls, but really it is about keeping the machine running keeping people happy. It is about doing what has always been done and hoping this time something will be different.

Bypass PrunersWe have all heard the saying “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” There is also another saying just as valid, “if it ain’t broke, break it.” Sometimes we need to break the machine, stop doing what we have always done. The Bible uses an agricultural analogy. It’s called pruning. Do you want health in your life and church, start pruning. Here is the bad news: people will be mad. People will call you lazy. Some will leave the church. Others will stay so they can tell you stories about how “committed” your predecessor was. It is okay, quit anyway.

In the book Ministry Velocity by Wayne Schmidt he quotes the late Dr. Orval Butcher who said, “‘The problem with most Wesleyan churches is not who we are willing to win, but who we’re not willing to lose.’ It was his way of saying he’d seen churches completely lose their vision and momentum in an attempt to appease one powerful person or interest group in the church. Attempts to please all the people or meet every need drain energy that might otherwise be focused on moving the vision forward” (pg. 37).

In the great words of the immortal philosopher Red Green, “I’m pulling of your, we’re all in this together.”

Pastor Stephen

Does He still move stones?

When the Sabbath was over, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James, and Salome bought spices so that they might go to anoint Jesus’ body. Very early on the first day of the week, just after sunrise, they were on their way to the tomb and they asked each other, “Who will roll the stone away from the entrance of the tomb?” But when they looked up, they saw that the stone, which was very large, had been rolled away.
(Mark 16:1-4, NIV)

The women came to the tomb to complete the burial process on Jesus’ body. There was just one problem. A large stone stood between them and what they were to do. It was an impossible dilemma for the women. Or, at least, so they thought.

When they came to the tomb they found the stone rolled away. They also found out that the task they thought they came to complete was really something very different. They did not come to this tomb to prepare a body, they came to this tomb to witness and declare a resurrection.

This week, I was asked a question, “Does God still move stones?” I will admit the first thought that came to my mind was kidney stones . . . yes; my mind works that way some times. Once my mind came back to the actual question I was asked I started to think about what the stones in our life might be that he would move. I think the stones are impossible, immovable situations in our life. As much as we may push, scratch, claw, hammer, and chip away at it, we cannot move the stone. We are stuck in our tombs. We are unable to do what we are to do and unable to reach Jesus.

Jesus said, “I am the resurrection and the life.” We quickly miss that Jesus said this before he was raised from the dead. Resurrection and life are part of his very character and identity. They describe, in some way, who he is and not just what he experienced.

Jesus is our resurrection and life. Moving stones is part of his very character and being. Whatever the impossible situation in your life is, he can roll the stone away and say to you, “Come out!”

Blessings,
Pastor Stephen

 

 

Again

ShadowsWell it has happened again. Another pastor has fallen from their ministry position because of an extramarital affair and apparent struggle with pornography. This time it was Bob Coy from the Calvary Chapel Ft. Lauderdale Church.

I want to say right up front that I have never met Bob Coy and know very, very little about the details of his situation. Since he lives in Florida, and I have never been there, I cannot even say with certainty that he and I have ever been in the same state at the same time.

Mr. Coy is certainly not the first, nor will he likely be the last, leader to be caught in this trap.  It does leave us wondering why did this happen? Why didn’t he seek help before everything fell apart? How could he throw away everything so easily? Much has been written in books on why men engage in extramarital affairs and I will not attempt to enter into the psychology of it all here but I do want to drill down one issue.  Maybe one reason he failed is because the church became too big, too big for him to fail.  At least that is perhaps how it felt. And to some degree it is probably a true statement.

Now before you think this is a statement against large churches, it is not. We all have something in our lives we say is “too big” to risk if we let light shine into our darkness. Don’t we? Our job, marriage, kids, community involvement, reputation, self-esteem, mortgage payment, car payment, vacation plans, career plans, building program, and on and on it goes.

There will always be something. It is part of the lie that satan tells us and we believe. The truth is, it is never as bad as we think and the sooner we deal with things the better. The issues will be bigger tomorrow, today is the day to let light shine into our darkness.

Here are some questions to ponder:

  • What steps have I taken in my life to put up boundaries to protect myself against temptation?
  • Do I have someone in my life (other than my spouse) that I trust and am accountable to?
  • If someone was to come to me with their struggles and darkness, could I be trusted to love them and walk with them or would I tear them down and betray the trust?

Blessings,
Pastor Stephen

Listen to the Music

shopping

 

Hello Friends,

A few months ago I started a second job in a home improvement retail establishment. The purpose of the job is to eliminate once and for all the never-ending student loan debt and get on with life. Recently I posted the following Facebook status update regarding my experience in retail:

“The worst thing about working in retail is the incredibly depressing music played over and over and over and over and over and over and over . . .”

It doesn’t take me long at work before I really wish that idiot who sings “Cross my heart and hope to die . . .” would. Or the reason you don’t have a girl like Jessie’s girl is because it is just creepy to sing about wanting Jessie’s girl. No girl in her right mind would go near you.

Many of you, who also work in the retail world, agreed with my assessment of the audio work environment. Since my original post I have continued to reflect on the phenomenon of employee and customer torture used by retail establishments across the world and came to some revolutionary insights. Okay, maybe they aren’t that earth shattering, but it’s my post so I can call it what I want.

The first nugget of wisdom I discovered is a little equation you can use to determine the level of service you can anticipate receiving in any given retail store. It looks like this.

T+Y=S

Time (in minutes) at work plus the number of years employed equal the service level score.

Now that you know the service level score you can compare it to this chart and have a realistic expectation regarding the level of service you are going to receive the next time you go shopping.

 

S

Employee’s Response to your Question

0-14 Welcome to our store. How may I help you?
15-29 Hi. Yes, I can tell you where the item you want is located.
30-44 Do I look like I care about your problems?
45+ My name is Inigo Montonya… You killed my father. Prepare to die.

 

The obvious question is, “Why would a store do this to its employees knowing the incredibly poor service it produces?” The racket is played because, this may come as a shock to you, but retail stores exist for one reason: to sell stuff. Through years of research they have found the mix of music also has an effect on its customers. I am about to give you the secret code which will transform all future shopping experiences for you. Once you know the influence the music is having on you, you can take measures to protect yourself. Here is the equation:

(T-N)+Sq=R

Time in the store minus the number of items on your list plus the square footage of the store equals your level of resistance to buying stuff you don’t need.

 

R

Your Response When Offered Something to Buy

0-499 I am only going to buy what is on my list.
500-999 I will take three, just in case.
1000-1499 I don’t know what it is, but I have always wanted one. Do you have a pallet in the back? I want them all.
1500+ Yes, I would love to sign-up for a store credit card.

 

The truth is, our environment affects us. My mental, emotional, and spiritual state can be radically influenced by the content I allow into my life. When I allow negative influences in my life I become a negative person. When I allow positive influences I become hopeful person. Paul says to us in Romans, “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will” (12:2, NIV). I am tempted to make excuses and say it is not really affecting me. Or, since I am a Christian, to say I have attained a level of spiritual maturity such that I am immune. What a bunch of . . .

Today, I want to challenge you to examine your life and find one area pumping negativity in your life and to cut it out for the next week and see the change in your life. It could be the evening news, a radio station, conspiracy theorist blogs, the barely dressed women of Fox News, or any number of other areas. Let’s stop pretending we are immune. We are not. And as Red Green says, “We are all in this together. I’m pulling for you.”

Blessings,
Stephen

The Otherside of Planning

Of course, like nearly everything there is another side. This comes from a book by Mark Batterson, lead pastor of National Community Church in Washington D.C.:

“The longer I live the more I think that spiritual maturity is less about figuring out the future and more about a moment-by-moment sensitivity to the Spirit of God. I’m not saying we shouldn’t make plans. But you might want to use a pencil with an eraser and have a shredder handy . . . Most of you never would have guessed ten years ago that you’d be doing what you’re doing or living where you’re living. And while you may have plans for the future, you have no idea what life will look like ten years from now. But that’s okay. I just don’t think spiritual maturity results in higher degrees of predictability . . . I believe in planning. I believe in goal setting. But there are some things in life you can’t plan or predict. And that drives the obsessive compulsive part of us crazy. We want control, but the decision to follow Christ is a relinquishment of control. Following Christ is letting Jesus take the wheel. Of course, some of us act like backseat drivers. Or worse yet, we’re like little kids that make their parents crazy by asking one question over and over again: Are we there yet?

I honestly think that question reveals something genetically wired into the human psyche. It comes standard. And while we may stop pestering our parents, we never outgrow the desire to know exactly where we’re headed and exactly when we’ll get there. We want a complete itinerary with everything mapped out.

What I’m trying to say in a nice way is this: We’re control freaks. But faith involves a loss of control. And with the loss of control comes the loss of certainty. You never know when a five-hundred-pound lion may cross your path. And faith is the willingness and readiness to embrace those uncertainties” (86-87).

lion

Quotation from:
Batterson, Mark. In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day How to Survive and Thrive When Opportunity Roars. Sisters: Multnomah, 2006. Print.

The Ordinary Plan

Why am I here? My life seems stuck. God get me out of this mess. How can I serve you when I am in this place?

All questions I have asked and statements I have made. There are some days I find it incredibly difficult to see beyond my present circumstances and to believe God might be up to something. Many a person has quoted Romans 8:28 in times of crisis and confusion. “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28, NIV). But if the passage is true in times of crisis is it not also just as true in the day to day monotony of life?

boredomBuilding Block #4: God is using our circumstances to position and prepare us to accomplish his vision for your life.

“Often there is no tangible connection between our circumstances and the vision God has given us” (44). Or at least that is how it may seem to us. God will use our current situation and circumstances as well as future circumstances to put in the place to accomplish his vision. In the short term current circumstances may seem to be moving us away from God’s vision.

“God ordained visions are always too big for us to handle. We shouldn’t be surprised. Consider the source. There are always more questions than answers when God births a vision in our hearts. There are always obstacles. There is always a lack of resources” (42).

Nehemiah was the cub-bearer to the king…of Babylon. But God had placed in his heart a vision for rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem. On the surface it would seem as though where he was at and what he was doing had absolutely nothing to do with God’s will for his life. But God knew better than Nehemiah. He had him in just the right place to fulfill the vision.

Reflection: What is the main thing about your current situation that makes it difficult for you to believe God is preparing you for his vision?

 

Blessings,
Stephen

 

Quotations taken from:
Stanley, Andy. Visioneering. Sisters, Or: Multnomah Publishers, 2005.

For Even

Dear Friends,

“For even.” Two powerful words which express the commonness of humanity and the ordinary mechanics of life. Words which force us back to reality when we are tempted to choose a special status for ourselves.

For even the jewels upon the crown were once dusty rocks in the ground carried by ordinary people.

For even the eagle which soars effortlessly on the currents of the air must stop and sleep.

PigFor even that sizzling juicy piece of bacon basking in the glow of the morning sun upon your plate was once a pig wallowing in the mud. Though truth be told, we may call it mud, we all know it is much more than that. It is months of sloppy horticultural stimulation goodness that when lathered upon a pig for thirty days gives your bacon a flavor nothing short of pure culinary ecstasy.

As Christians our call is to live a life guided by the for even.

For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many (Mark 10:45, NIV)

For even the one who holds the universe in his hands used his hands to touch the infected skin of a leper.

For even the one who spoke this world into existence spoke words of forgiveness to a woman caught in adultery.

For even he whose will alone determines the movements of the universe knelt down and washed his disciples feet.

For even the one who existed before time would walk the dusty roads of the Middle East.

For even he who could call down 10,000 angels to come to his aid chose to suffer on a cross.

For even Jesus served and came to serve.

As Christians in the United States we enjoy many benefits. We have built magnificent buildings. We have carved out a Christian culture for ourselves. And as great as the blessings and benefits we relish are, we must never forget the for even.

Our call is to serve not to be served. Our call is to surrender over status. Our example is one of suffering. For even I am sinner saved by grace alone.

Blessings,
Stephen

Waiting and Planning

Dear Friends,

One of the great challenges for college faculty is figuring out a way to manipulate . . . err . . . motivate students to participate in hours of seemly endless drudgery and pay for the privilege. If you happen to be a student in the religion department at a Nazarene institution, like I was, you can be sure quotes from the likes of John Wesley and Phineas F. Bresee,Breseefounder of the Church of the Nazarene, are certainly going to make their way into the motivational repertoire. One of those I heard frequently was a story of a person asking old Phiney what he would do if he were told he only had ten years to live. Phiney, lowering his voice and fixing his eyes on his poor unsuspecting inquisitor replied he would spend the first five years preparing for the last five. With that men came into the room and carried off the questioner to study in one of the many fine Nazarene institutions of higher learning. From then on no one dared asked Phiney any more questions.

Whether the story is true or legend it illustrates an important principle about the steps we take as a visions grows within our souls.

Building Block #3: Pray for opportunities and plan as if you expect God to answer your prayers.

“New visions die easily. And understandably so. There is little to go on. Praying and planning will help you keep your vision alive. And that is critical. When your vision dies, part of you dies as well. So pray. Pray for opportunities. Pray for the people who could help you launch your vision. And while you wait, plan! Develop a strategy. Dream on paper. Find the one or two things you can do and get busy” (38).

It may seem counterintuitive to pray and plan at the same time but planning is about putting ourselves in a position where we are able to respond to God when the time comes. Nehemiah had a vision for rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem, but he was the cup bearer to the King of Babylon. What are some the areas that Nehemiah would have been able to plan for? He could have planned how he would respond when God softened the King’s heart and opened a door for Nehemiah to travel to Jerusalem. He could have thought about what he was going to need, the letters for travel, the supplies, etc. He might have even looked into just how a wall is built. We know that there were non-Jewish people living in the land at the time. He could have studied their languages, at least enough the ask where the bathroom is at and the directions to the nearest McDonalds. These are just a few.
Even as we plan, we should not be surprised if God uses our plans in a way we never expected.

If the opportunity came today for you to move toward your vision would we be ready? What can you do to prepare?

Blessings,
Stephen

 

Quotations taken from:
Stanley, Andy. Visioneering. Sisters, Or: Multnomah Publishers, 2005.

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